Monday, March 5, 2012

Hearts Were Meant to Give Away

For where your treasure is there will your heart be also.  That is my favorite heart quotation.  It is from Matthew 6:21.  Whenever I sit down to read the bible I read Matthew 5 to Matthew 8.  There are so many beautiful quotations in those three chapters.  The most important relevant one in the last few days is not to keep your light lit under a bushel.    I moved out of the darkness and into the light this last week.  I grieved for my brother, for my mother, for my father and for the 4 year old boy and his 6 year old sister who were left behind.  And I am finally free. That is such a wonderful light feeling even if you have to lose your mind to do it.

Seek and you shall find.  There really is no doubt that scripture means exactly what it says.  If you believe in God, Jesus, or a higher power you really have to search for your heart and what belongs in there.  Be it the missing pieces left behind when your loved ones moved on, or the things you love to do like embroider or listen to music or dance.  Our hearts know what they know.  There is no logical explanation for it, we can't really find what we are looking for unless we look for it and then let it go.  If it's real it comes back and if not well we are always better for the experience.

I have been making hearts for a long time, but it is only in the last few months that my artistry has really taken off and my hearts have really begun to soar all over upstate New York.  I love to make them, I love to watch people when they pick them up, especially if they are filled with french knots as people can feel the texture, notice the subtleties and nuances and feel them with their eyes closed. Variations of color, texture and subtlety that feed the soul.

A good book, a beautiful song, a piece in an embroidery hoop, they all have something beautiful to offer us.   One of my favorite books is Anam Cara.  It is about the bonding of two souls in friendship. I have been very lucky in my Anam Cara as I have always found a bit more of the light by almost all of the friendships I have made.

You're the One by the Black Keys is a beautiful song which reminds me of my son, my one and only unconditional light, he shines for me every single morning and I am so joyful that I have him. It is about finding the one that you are supposed to be with, the light is on.   It also features a plaintiff wail that certainly touched my heart and brought me into the light.  It is one of my favorite songs.

And then there is the embroidery, the one constant in my entire life.  I have been embroidering since I was 6 years old.  My grandmother taught me how to embroider, probably one of those days that I spent when life was so hard for my adult parents, and my brother and I were unaware.  I really think being a hand embroiderer is what saved my life for all those years.  Taking little stitches and patching up all the holes in my life and other peoples lives.  It's a huge metaphor for the piece of our heart that was taken on that April day in 1964.  We just patched over our loss and moved on.  Now I can say out loud and with great joy that I am a hand embroidery artist.  It took me a very long time to find my voice but I found it.  And I can say the patch is gone and replaced by light.

I'm going to take off from the blog for a few days and rest up and regroup.  The name of this bird is Little.  She is a special little bird who kept me company during my dark night of the soul.  If you would like to discuss this post or inquire about purchasing one of my hearts you can email me at
debraann813@yahoo.com.

Find your light, find your messenger because even though it makes you a little crazy it is a wonderful joyful experience to live in the light again.