Friday, March 2, 2012

This Little Light of Mine

This little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine, this little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine. These are my too little lights, the lights of my life, my old soul dog Charlotte and my wonderful beautiful old soul son Brian.  My dog is the one who keeps me awake every night and aggravated at dinner.  My son is the sun in my morning for every single day of his 20 year old life.  He is the reason I live.  My greatest work of art.  He is the reason I  am alive to tell my dark night of the soul and the reason I was inspired at 3:30 in the morning to write darkest post of my blog history.  Everything is out now, the sunlight is breaking through the window and I am finally free.  I am going to spend the rest of my life showing him that you can survive anything and still have a little bit of sonshine in your life or a lot of pride and happiness to have such a beautiful son.  Hopefully he will not see this because he will be modest and shy and yes probably embarrassed.   I think he is used to that.  Live with an over the top personality long enough and well you  know.

From now on I will talk about embroidery and art in inspirational tones.Sometimes we are a little dense when inspiration hits us and sometimes we are just unaware that music, laughter and art combine to heal even the most tortured of happy souls.  I lived in a private darkness because I didn't want people to pity me, I  wanted  them to like me so I showed them the light and hid the dark.  But then all of us serve a purpose in this world.  My purpose is to find all the bright shiny objects in the darkness and somehow stitch them together.  If you are feeling sorry for yourself because something minor has been broken, or someone you love has been taken away, or you flunked out of school get over it.  In a world where nobody talks about darkness except in a therapists chair we are a land of broken people .  It's time to pick up your heart, stitch it back together, leave other's in stitches and just keep on stitching. It's very productive to soul work than anything else because you have to concentrate on each little stitch.

And please, just please bookmark my previous post and everytime you think you can not make it one more day, think this little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.  And pay attention to the universe and you may find your embroidery,  art and music that makes you happy.

Realizing you could be living in any other family and be dead with all the hell you've lived through is very liberating.  I love the direction I'm going in now and I will forever be greatful to God for my unconditional loves.

I edited this post because after a few good hours of sleep it sounded like a good idea.